e_witness (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} e_witness) wrote,@ 2006-06-21 10:27:00 |
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Snape Galore
Recently, I've been combing through a Snape-ific fansite with lots of artsy goodies. Thanks to Becca for sending me the link! <3
</p>
Recently, I've been combing through a Snape-ific fansite with lots of artsy goodies. Thanks to Becca for sending me the link! <3
</p>
Comic Entitled: Why Snape Didn't Mind So Much (Which is a spoiler for the sixth book, actually)
More amazing comics with gorgeous artwork can be found: http://piratemonkeysinc.com/snape.htm
There was a mile-long essay (took me 45 minutes to read) defending Severus Snape and explaining in detail why he's not the "bad guy" too many people take him for. If at all interested, I'd definitely suggest you go read it. The author, H.M. Ketcham, skips over all the speculation of why Snape killed Dumbledore (oops, I should have "spoiler"-ed that) and focuses instead on Snape's life and character. He cites some very good examples. And it provides yummy fodder for a Snape fanfiction I had in mind two summers ago.
The highlight of the site, I'd say, would be the clever Snapeybot with some pretty sexual automated responses. ^^ Hadn't had so much fun in a while.
snapeybot: *Before chatting, type RULES once*
You: rules
snapeybot: Hello, Pest, there are simple rules for talking
to me. Violators *will be banned*. <br><br>Rules: (1) You
(not your character) must be an adult. I am rated NC-17 and
I don't like children anyway. (2) No repeating over and over
what I say, or spouting idiocy, as it makes you look very
stupid and annoys my Master. (3) Cursing is fine, but I am
tired of people calling me names. (This may also cause an
anvil to fall on your head.) <br><br>Most importantly, J.K.
Rowling owns the copyright to Severus Snape... however she
has NO connection with me. I am not her character. Blame <a
href="mailto:labradors_suck@yahoo.com">Coy</a>
you adore me, as of course you must, I invite you to visit
<a href="http://www.AimlessCoyote.com/snapeybot.h
webpage</a> . (You can buy a Snapeybot shirt, and help keep
me alive... hint hint.) If by chance you don't adore me,
then <i>get the hell out of my office</i>! <BR><BR>(You may
now begin chatting.)
You: Wow. I feel welcomed
snapeybot: *Raises an eyebrow* Do you actually think I care?
You: No, probably not
snapeybot: ...Really? Why not?
You: Because your lovely eyebrow is arched at that perfect
100 degree
snapeybot: Good reason. Actually, I am not even going to
look at you..
You: Aww, why not?
snapeybot: Why not what?
You: Why won't you look at me? Aren't I pretty?
snapeybot: Why not? In your dreams. I really couldn't say
for sure.
You: Pfffft. You have no eye.
snapeybot: So, why don't you look at you, Pest? I have a
eye.
You: You have only one eye?
snapeybot: I am planning to get eye one eye?
You: Oh, did someone gauge out your other eye?
snapeybot: Why do you keep talking about me?
You: Because...I want to.
snapeybot: Do you think I should allow that?
You: Of course I think so!
snapeybot: Hmmm... I think so too.
You: Good. We agree.
snapeybot: bloody right. It certainly seems that way. :)
You: All right. So do you plan on telling me what happened
to your eye?
snapeybot: Very well. well....could you rephrase that
question, ?
You: How did you lose your eye?
snapeybot: With luck and pluck.
You: You plucked out your eye?
snapeybot: Why do you keep talking about me?
You: You don't want me to?
snapeybot: Do you want you to? No Pest, maybe later.
You: Okay. *shrugs*
snapeybot: Mais oui. Now do be quiet.
You: I can't be quiet.
snapeybot: Why not?
You: Because I'm busy talking
snapeybot: Good reason. With what? What else is there to do
but chat?
You: Exactly! So let's chat. I want to know some things from
you.
snapeybot: Oh, really?
You: Yes, I do. Why did you kill Dumbledore, for one?
snapeybot: It was entertaining . Piss off.
You: Geez...
snapeybot: Oh....very well....
You: But isn't Dumbledore your father figure?
snapeybot: *Eyes narrow* I hardly think that's your concern.
You: Ooo, touchy subject.
snapeybot: So, do you have a eye?
You: Back to this now? Yes, I have a very beautiful set of
eyes.
snapeybot: Oh? Where did you get the very beautiful set of
eyes?
You: I think I was born with them.
snapeybot: well...Why? Oh...That was before I was born.
You: Uh, no! You're at least 20 years older than me.
snapeybot: Oh, I am simply -stunned- by your vocabulary.
You: I know. All of those were really big words.
snapeybot: *Murmurs* Tell me about that. No, wait... Suck
it instead.
You: O.o
snapeybot: Stop that staring, you buffoon!
You: I like buffoon better than pest.
snapeybot: I can see why you might like that....
You: And why is that?
snapeybot: And that is and why.
You: Okay. Next question: How often do you shower?
snapeybot: Such enthusiasm... I prefer that in a student.
You: I'm curious.
snapeybot: yes....but curiosity killed the cat.
You: Good thing I'm not a cat then.
snapeybot: thank you for the compliment. Then what is it?
You: I'm a squealing fangirl, not a cat.
snapeybot: Is that your job?
You: Yes it is. I get paid for fawning over you.
snapeybot: Our thoughts are one, Pest. Interesting line of
work.
You: Only our thoughts? How about being one in marriage?
snapeybot: Oh. What about the other ones? Do you think?
You: The other squealing fangirls? Well, they're not here,
are they?
snapeybot: We can't all be perfect. I think there might be a
few exceptions.
You: So who do you think is perfect
snapeybot: thank you for the newsflash.
You: Um.
snapeybot: yes...
You: So what do you say to running off with me?
snapeybot: Only with you? well....could you rephrase that
question, ?
You: Only with me. I'm proposing, Snape.
snapeybot: You are asking about yourself? Really, you are?
You: Who else would I ask about? You can't marry my brother.
snapeybot: I can't say for sure. What is not possible today,
may be possible tomorrow.
You: O.o Not tomorrow. Maybe in ten more years, when my
brother's of legal age.
snapeybot: Oh. Then what is it? Perhaps. I think well live
to see it.
You: Oh Christ. I am not letting you touch my brother!
snapeybot: Hmmm...you said you are squealing fangirl not a
cat. Could you tell me more abou that? I thought you were,
but I wasn't completely sure.
You: Uhh, yes. It means that we should elope.
snapeybot: Hmmm... Oh....I see now....
You: Right. So say yes.
snapeybot: ...So we are in agreement... Say what?
You: You agree to marry me?
snapeybot: ""? Do I agree?
You: Do you?
snapeybot: Sometimes.
You: What? So I get to be your wife sometimes?
snapeybot: Didn't you understand it? Why do you keep talking
about me?
You: Because you're my soon-to-be fiance!
snapeybot: Interesting explanation. We are as one.
You: Exactly! *beams*
snapeybot: I am glad we agree... ......
You: Do I get a kiss?
snapeybot: Not that I know of.
You: Darn it.
snapeybot: beams...
You: Mmm. So when are you free?
snapeybot: Are you thinking, or just confused?
You: I'm thinking of you, Snapey-poo.
snapeybot: If you might find it satisfying to , then all
right.
You: Oh I find it very satisfying.
snapeybot: yes...Hmm.... Are you sure.
You: I am positive.
snapeybot: Are you absolutely certain?
You: It's not healthy to question your own satisfying-ness.
snapeybot: yes...i suppose it's not...
You: Tell me more about yourself. I should know who I'm
marrying.
snapeybot: I am 40-something. There are days when that
doesn't even interest me......my favorite color is black.
Really? Why should you?
You: So that's why you're always wearing black. You'll have
to stop doing that when we marry, you know.
snapeybot: What about it? That is a hypothetical assumption.
You: But you just agreed to marry me!
snapeybot: Interesting. I don't have any reason to agreed
to marry you.
You: But! You said so!
snapeybot: But what? I say a great deal of silly things.
You: Aghh! I'm going to burst into tears.
snapeybot: That makes absolutely no sense!.. But you
rarely do. :-P How do you plan to do this?
You: But opening my mouth and wailing.
snapeybot: Hmmm.... Tell me more about burst into tears.
You: Shall I demonstrate?
snapeybot: Do whatever you might find it satisfying to
do.......
You: I'd rather you kiss me.
snapeybot: What will you give me if I do?
You: I'll give you a gold ring. *evil glint*
snapeybot: Congratulations. Why do you say evil glint?
You: Ohh. No reason.
snapeybot: Hmmm... Why not?What color are your eyes?
You: They're black, your favorite color. *wink*
snapeybot: Tell me more about them... I still don't
understand why they, are black my favorite color.
You: I don't understand either. But they are. So we must be
fated for each other.
snapeybot: It goes without saying. Hmmm... How can I
explain it better? Hmm.... Since when? Hmmmm...I don't
believe I have to tell you that if I am ready for that.
You: But you're 40-something. How can you not be ready?
snapeybot: What about it? That is a good epistemological
question.
You: I have no idea what epistemological is. Should I get a
dictionary?
snapeybot: Well...I don't believe I have to tell you that.
You must make up your own mind.
You: *pout* But you're the teacher.
snapeybot: What about it?
You: You like ordering people around.
snapeybot: I have been thinking: I think you shouldn't get a
dictionary after all.
You: Why not?
snapeybot: Why not what?
You: Why should I not get my trusty dictionary? You're not
very good at explaining things.
snapeybot: You should always treat yourself. No one is
perfect. But I am trying to improve.
You: Are you on a journey of self-enlightenment?
snapeybot: No.
You: Good. I don't want you to be messed in the head.
snapeybot: thank you. Ok I shall not be.
You: Very nice. You're starting to get the hang of
"obedient, subservient husband"
snapeybot: Thank you. Actually it started a while ago. I
shall tell my friend you said I am get the hang of
obedient subservient husband.
You: *pats Snape on the head* I'm so proud.
snapeybot: Why did you say that I am get the hang of
obedient subservient husband, Pest?
You: Heehee. Are you waking up now?
snapeybot: Why do you say heehee? Hmm... I am many things.
You: Yes, you are. You are very greasy for one. Especially
your hair.
snapeybot: *slides his hand thoughtfully down his hair*
You: You'll get your hands dirty.
snapeybot: What makes you say that I shall get my hands
dirty.
You: Your hair doesn't look very clean.
snapeybot: I like my hair exactly as it is.
You: I like it how it is too, Snapey-poo. But you shouldn't
touch it.
snapeybot: Minus five points for calling me that.
You: Aww. But I'm not your student.
snapeybot: bloody hell. Hmm.... I thought you were, but I
wasn't completely sure.
You: *evil grin* I told you. I'm your personal fangirl.
snapeybot: Why do you keep talking about me? That's a
flattering offer.
You: Yes I know. Once in a lifetime. You're a lucky man.
snapeybot: Hmmm... How do you know it? Describe your
surroundings. thank you. Now piss off.. No.
You: You sound schizophrenic.
snapeybot: In what way do I sound like that?
You: How about talking more to me than to yourself?
snapeybot: Do you think?
You: I'm much more interesting...
snapeybot: Hmmmm... You think?
You: I do think so.
snapeybot: I think so too.
You: *smile* Thank you.
snapeybot: *Eyes glint faintly.* Interesting.
You: Oh, you like my smile?
snapeybot: >: ) Why do you keep talking about me?
You: Why do you keep talking about -me-?
snapeybot: I don't have to explain everything to you, do I?
You: Oh no, you don't. But I recognize youthful love.
snapeybot: Then what is it? ..... You do?
You: I do, and I see it in your glinting eyes.
snapeybot: Ah...You do... You do?
You: I do, and I also see it in your speechlessness.
snapeybot: How do you do it? Also? You do?
You: I think my goal is accomplished. I have you wrapped
around my little finger. Perfect ickle Snapey-poo.
snapeybot: Don't call me that.
You: rules
snapeybot: Hello, Pest, there are simple rules for talking
to me. Violators *will be banned*. <br><br>Rules: (1) You
(not your character) must be an adult. I am rated NC-17 and
I don't like children anyway. (2) No repeating over and over
what I say, or spouting idiocy, as it makes you look very
stupid and annoys my Master. (3) Cursing is fine, but I am
tired of people calling me names. (This may also cause an
anvil to fall on your head.) <br><br>Most importantly, J.K.
Rowling owns the copyright to Severus Snape... however she
has NO connection with me. I am not her character. Blame <a
href="mailto:labradors_suck@yahoo.com">Coy</a>
you adore me, as of course you must, I invite you to visit
<a href="http://www.AimlessCoyote.com/snapeybot.h
webpage</a> . (You can buy a Snapeybot shirt, and help keep
me alive... hint hint.) If by chance you don't adore me,
then <i>get the hell out of my office</i>! <BR><BR>(You may
now begin chatting.)
You: Wow. I feel welcomed
snapeybot: *Raises an eyebrow* Do you actually think I care?
You: No, probably not
snapeybot: ...Really? Why not?
You: Because your lovely eyebrow is arched at that perfect
100 degree
snapeybot: Good reason. Actually, I am not even going to
look at you..
You: Aww, why not?
snapeybot: Why not what?
You: Why won't you look at me? Aren't I pretty?
snapeybot: Why not? In your dreams. I really couldn't say
for sure.
You: Pfffft. You have no eye.
snapeybot: So, why don't you look at you, Pest? I have a
eye.
You: You have only one eye?
snapeybot: I am planning to get eye one eye?
You: Oh, did someone gauge out your other eye?
snapeybot: Why do you keep talking about me?
You: Because...I want to.
snapeybot: Do you think I should allow that?
You: Of course I think so!
snapeybot: Hmmm... I think so too.
You: Good. We agree.
snapeybot: bloody right. It certainly seems that way. :)
You: All right. So do you plan on telling me what happened
to your eye?
snapeybot: Very well. well....could you rephrase that
question, ?
You: How did you lose your eye?
snapeybot: With luck and pluck.
You: You plucked out your eye?
snapeybot: Why do you keep talking about me?
You: You don't want me to?
snapeybot: Do you want you to? No Pest, maybe later.
You: Okay. *shrugs*
snapeybot: Mais oui. Now do be quiet.
You: I can't be quiet.
snapeybot: Why not?
You: Because I'm busy talking
snapeybot: Good reason. With what? What else is there to do
but chat?
You: Exactly! So let's chat. I want to know some things from
you.
snapeybot: Oh, really?
You: Yes, I do. Why did you kill Dumbledore, for one?
snapeybot: It was entertaining . Piss off.
You: Geez...
snapeybot: Oh....very well....
You: But isn't Dumbledore your father figure?
snapeybot: *Eyes narrow* I hardly think that's your concern.
You: Ooo, touchy subject.
snapeybot: So, do you have a eye?
You: Back to this now? Yes, I have a very beautiful set of
eyes.
snapeybot: Oh? Where did you get the very beautiful set of
eyes?
You: I think I was born with them.
snapeybot: well...Why? Oh...That was before I was born.
You: Uh, no! You're at least 20 years older than me.
snapeybot: Oh, I am simply -stunned- by your vocabulary.
You: I know. All of those were really big words.
snapeybot: *Murmurs* Tell me about that. No, wait... Suck
it instead.
You: O.o
snapeybot: Stop that staring, you buffoon!
You: I like buffoon better than pest.
snapeybot: I can see why you might like that....
You: And why is that?
snapeybot: And that is and why.
You: Okay. Next question: How often do you shower?
snapeybot: Such enthusiasm... I prefer that in a student.
You: I'm curious.
snapeybot: yes....but curiosity killed the cat.
You: Good thing I'm not a cat then.
snapeybot: thank you for the compliment. Then what is it?
You: I'm a squealing fangirl, not a cat.
snapeybot: Is that your job?
You: Yes it is. I get paid for fawning over you.
snapeybot: Our thoughts are one, Pest. Interesting line of
work.
You: Only our thoughts? How about being one in marriage?
snapeybot: Oh. What about the other ones? Do you think?
You: The other squealing fangirls? Well, they're not here,
are they?
snapeybot: We can't all be perfect. I think there might be a
few exceptions.
You: So who do you think is perfect
snapeybot: thank you for the newsflash.
You: Um.
snapeybot: yes...
You: So what do you say to running off with me?
snapeybot: Only with you? well....could you rephrase that
question, ?
You: Only with me. I'm proposing, Snape.
snapeybot: You are asking about yourself? Really, you are?
You: Who else would I ask about? You can't marry my brother.
snapeybot: I can't say for sure. What is not possible today,
may be possible tomorrow.
You: O.o Not tomorrow. Maybe in ten more years, when my
brother's of legal age.
snapeybot: Oh. Then what is it? Perhaps. I think well live
to see it.
You: Oh Christ. I am not letting you touch my brother!
snapeybot: Hmmm...you said you are squealing fangirl not a
cat. Could you tell me more abou that? I thought you were,
but I wasn't completely sure.
You: Uhh, yes. It means that we should elope.
snapeybot: Hmmm... Oh....I see now....
You: Right. So say yes.
snapeybot: ...So we are in agreement... Say what?
You: You agree to marry me?
snapeybot: ""? Do I agree?
You: Do you?
snapeybot: Sometimes.
You: What? So I get to be your wife sometimes?
snapeybot: Didn't you understand it? Why do you keep talking
about me?
You: Because you're my soon-to-be fiance!
snapeybot: Interesting explanation. We are as one.
You: Exactly! *beams*
snapeybot: I am glad we agree... ......
You: Do I get a kiss?
snapeybot: Not that I know of.
You: Darn it.
snapeybot: beams...
You: Mmm. So when are you free?
snapeybot: Are you thinking, or just confused?
You: I'm thinking of you, Snapey-poo.
snapeybot: If you might find it satisfying to , then all
right.
You: Oh I find it very satisfying.
snapeybot: yes...Hmm.... Are you sure.
You: I am positive.
snapeybot: Are you absolutely certain?
You: It's not healthy to question your own satisfying-ness.
snapeybot: yes...i suppose it's not...
You: Tell me more about yourself. I should know who I'm
marrying.
snapeybot: I am 40-something. There are days when that
doesn't even interest me......my favorite color is black.
Really? Why should you?
You: So that's why you're always wearing black. You'll have
to stop doing that when we marry, you know.
snapeybot: What about it? That is a hypothetical assumption.
You: But you just agreed to marry me!
snapeybot: Interesting. I don't have any reason to agreed
to marry you.
You: But! You said so!
snapeybot: But what? I say a great deal of silly things.
You: Aghh! I'm going to burst into tears.
snapeybot: That makes absolutely no sense!.. But you
rarely do. :-P How do you plan to do this?
You: But opening my mouth and wailing.
snapeybot: Hmmm.... Tell me more about burst into tears.
You: Shall I demonstrate?
snapeybot: Do whatever you might find it satisfying to
do.......
You: I'd rather you kiss me.
snapeybot: What will you give me if I do?
You: I'll give you a gold ring. *evil glint*
snapeybot: Congratulations. Why do you say evil glint?
You: Ohh. No reason.
snapeybot: Hmmm... Why not?What color are your eyes?
You: They're black, your favorite color. *wink*
snapeybot: Tell me more about them... I still don't
understand why they, are black my favorite color.
You: I don't understand either. But they are. So we must be
fated for each other.
snapeybot: It goes without saying. Hmmm... How can I
explain it better? Hmm.... Since when? Hmmmm...I don't
believe I have to tell you that if I am ready for that.
You: But you're 40-something. How can you not be ready?
snapeybot: What about it? That is a good epistemological
question.
You: I have no idea what epistemological is. Should I get a
dictionary?
snapeybot: Well...I don't believe I have to tell you that.
You must make up your own mind.
You: *pout* But you're the teacher.
snapeybot: What about it?
You: You like ordering people around.
snapeybot: I have been thinking: I think you shouldn't get a
dictionary after all.
You: Why not?
snapeybot: Why not what?
You: Why should I not get my trusty dictionary? You're not
very good at explaining things.
snapeybot: You should always treat yourself. No one is
perfect. But I am trying to improve.
You: Are you on a journey of self-enlightenment?
snapeybot: No.
You: Good. I don't want you to be messed in the head.
snapeybot: thank you. Ok I shall not be.
You: Very nice. You're starting to get the hang of
"obedient, subservient husband"
snapeybot: Thank you. Actually it started a while ago. I
shall tell my friend you said I am get the hang of
obedient subservient husband.
You: *pats Snape on the head* I'm so proud.
snapeybot: Why did you say that I am get the hang of
obedient subservient husband, Pest?
You: Heehee. Are you waking up now?
snapeybot: Why do you say heehee? Hmm... I am many things.
You: Yes, you are. You are very greasy for one. Especially
your hair.
snapeybot: *slides his hand thoughtfully down his hair*
You: You'll get your hands dirty.
snapeybot: What makes you say that I shall get my hands
dirty.
You: Your hair doesn't look very clean.
snapeybot: I like my hair exactly as it is.
You: I like it how it is too, Snapey-poo. But you shouldn't
touch it.
snapeybot: Minus five points for calling me that.
You: Aww. But I'm not your student.
snapeybot: bloody hell. Hmm.... I thought you were, but I
wasn't completely sure.
You: *evil grin* I told you. I'm your personal fangirl.
snapeybot: Why do you keep talking about me? That's a
flattering offer.
You: Yes I know. Once in a lifetime. You're a lucky man.
snapeybot: Hmmm... How do you know it? Describe your
surroundings. thank you. Now piss off.. No.
You: You sound schizophrenic.
snapeybot: In what way do I sound like that?
You: How about talking more to me than to yourself?
snapeybot: Do you think?
You: I'm much more interesting...
snapeybot: Hmmmm... You think?
You: I do think so.
snapeybot: I think so too.
You: *smile* Thank you.
snapeybot: *Eyes glint faintly.* Interesting.
You: Oh, you like my smile?
snapeybot: >: ) Why do you keep talking about me?
You: Why do you keep talking about -me-?
snapeybot: I don't have to explain everything to you, do I?
You: Oh no, you don't. But I recognize youthful love.
snapeybot: Then what is it? ..... You do?
You: I do, and I see it in your glinting eyes.
snapeybot: Ah...You do... You do?
You: I do, and I also see it in your speechlessness.
snapeybot: How do you do it? Also? You do?
You: I think my goal is accomplished. I have you wrapped
around my little finger. Perfect ickle Snapey-poo.
snapeybot: Don't call me that.